The latest e-mail update...

Here is an e-mail I sent out today udpating everyone on Chris's situation...

I haven't updated in a while...But there's been so much going on with Chris and his foot.

I'll update the basics and then copy the latest e-mail from him at the end...

The last update was that Chris was going in for another surgery on April 20th. Well, from what I understand, they took about 2" off the left side and 3" off the right side of his foot. At first they seemed very optimistic about the results. By Tuesday they were saying that if it continued to look good, the swelling stayed down, and the infection started to subside like they hoped Chris would be able to go home for a month with in-home nurse care for the (now) wound, and then come back for the skin grafts toward the end of May. However, a day later they decided the infection simply wasn't getting under control like they would like. Because of this they wanted him in a more sterile environment and put in the order to have him transferred to St. Elizabeth's burn unit (room 134) for further treatment. This is also a proactive move in that the skin grafts would probably have to be done here anyway.

Tami sent a picture of Chris's foot yesterday ~ if you can imagine, the top of his foot looks almost unreal (Scott & I both said it looks like a Hollywood horror flick makeup job) with approximately the size of an 8 oz. steak missing from the top of his foot. The area is blackened in spots and obviously infected. (for someone who doesn't do well with horror flicks it was not an easy picture to look at for any length of time. Knowing there are people who are curious and trying to imagine what it looks like, if you'd like to see it e-mail me back and I'll send it in a separate e-mail ~ I don't want to attach it here because most people have pictures show in their e-mails automatically and not everyone cares to see it.)

This is definitely starting to wear on my sister. Jake, the youngest, is still at home in Norfolk during the week for school ~ he was in Lincoln yesterday for a soccer game (God's amazing attention to detail....), and Tam did get to see him play, but then only got to talk to him for about 5 minutes after before Jake had to get on the bus to head back home. When I called her she answered the phone in tears. (And, although we are cry-ers, this was more indicative of the toll this whole thing is taking on my sister than anything else.) Please continue to pray for them ~ in every report there is an amazing instance of God doing something in their lives...and it's pretty awesome.

So, with all that, here's the latest from Chris ~ an e-mail I received today....Thank you all for praying! If you'd like to help in some way, please contact me and I'll share with you an idea I have that is making this a little easier to be so far away...thanks again!

Dear Family & Friends,

Well a little update on what's happening, today the Doc looked at my foot and felt that the swelling hadn't changed, maybe even increased a little, plus some red is going up my leg. He suspects a pocket of infection somewhere around my ankle. So tomorrow morning I go in for another surgery, he said he will start out small and he wants to stay away from my ankle bone because that complicates the skin graft process. But he will have to remove any bad tissue that may have tunneled to wherever. I would appreciate your prayers, I know you have been faithful in that, since I checked in the hospital, and we appreciate it very much. To be specific pray that I will handle the surgery well and that the Doc will be able to find the problem, correct it and that my healing will be more progressive because of it. Pray for Tami she is having a hard time handling this, and at first when they transfered me here to St. E's it was like pulling the rug out from under me (stole that from my father-in-law). I am adjusting better now, I feel good other than my foot hurts a little. I did have my hopes up on getting home sooner, I just have to put it all in the Lord's hands and remember He sees the big picture.

Thanks to everyone,
Chris

I'm going to be posting a list of prayer requests Tami & Chris have asked in their e-mails on my blog ~ http://trayctalks.blogspot.com ~ check it regularly since I sometimes go there to write about what's going on without filling your in-box with multiple e-mails. Likewise, if you would like to NOT receive these updates please let me know and I'll remove your name...thank you!! God bless...be on the lookout for where He's working today, okay?

Trayc
Whether we can mentally grasp what God is doing isn't the task we have at hand...whether we are available to see God moving is the question we must ask ourselves as we go about our daily tasks.

The Foot Book

hey everyone ~ I received an e-mail from my Brother-in-law, Chris, tonight giving an update as to what's going on since his last surgery. I thought I'd just paste it here so you'd know from him how to pray. And...to be encouraged by him as well. He's a pretty amazing guy.

Here it is:

To All special people who have kept me in there thoughts and prayers,

Yes that's you, if you have received this e-mail you are special to me and I
thank you for your support in prayer and thought. It's Thursday the 19th I
reference the date mostly for myself because the days have seem to slip
together. The Doc came in yesterday and looked at my foot, wound He was
pleased with the progress. My upper leg looks good, pretty much normal, the
incision looks real good. The swelling and redness is pretty much down to
just above my ankle, the right side of my ankle is particularly tender and
discolored, the other side is not as and the color is better. Doc has me
scheduled for surgery Friday morning at 7:30 am, he thinks that ankle area
needs some more work, so we will see. I think once he cleans that area out
I will see more improvement, He is a sharp duede and I'lll leave that up to
him. What would we do without gifted surgeons like him? I have had
execellent care at this hospital, there are many good people here. I'm
filling my time in with; reading my Bible, reading a book that Josh gave me,
(The Last Season) playing my guitar, looking at magazines, drawing pictures
for my nephrew, watching some t.v. answering e-mails and sending e-mails,
eating snacks people have brought, visiting when I get visitors, and that is
about it. Today Tami and I went outwside for awhile, the first time in about
13 days or so for me, it was very nice. Well that's about it for now, thanks
again for your many prayers, I know they have been heard and results have
been seen because of them. We serve a mighty God who loves and cares very
much for us. I was reading Psalm 16 the other day and came across this,
verse 8-"I have set the Lord always before me; because He is at my right
hand I shall not be moved" I thought about that for a while and I pondered
what does "at His right hand" mean. Being in this position that I am, it is
hard to do many normal activities, I need to keep my leg elevated most of
the time, so when I need something it needs to be within reach and you learn
what things are most needed within that reach. So to have the Lord at our
right hand,, means we have all that He has available to Him,(all His
blessings, promises, guidance, strength, etc.) at our readily accessible
reach, all we have to do is ask. What an awesome thing to comprehend.

Later,
Chris

Thank you all for praying! I so appreciate the prayers you are sending up for my family and for me. Please know you are all in our prayers as well. In fact, if there's anything specific we can be praying for, please let me know via e-mail or in the comments section here.

God bless you!

"And He said to me, 'My grace is sufficient
for you, for power is perfected in weakness.' Most gladly, therefore, I will
rather boast about my weaknesses, that the power of Christ may dwell in me.
Therefore, I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses,
with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ's sake, for when I am weak,
then I am strong." 2 Corinthians 12: 9-10

Bro-to-go!

Hello! Well, my heart is much lighter than the last time I wrote. Let me fill you in on what has happened since Wednesday when I posted about Chris, my Brother-in-law.

Wednesday night the surgeon came in to look over Chris's leg ~ the infection had spread up to his derriere, and no antibiotic was touching it. It was time for drastic measures. According to my sister's e-mail the doctor prepared them for three different scenarios:

1) They would open up his leg and discover the infection was still only in the soft tissue, and not in the muscle as they suspected, and they could do a biopsy and stitch him back up. (45 minutes approx.)

2) They would open up his leg and discover that the infection had indeed gone into his muscle. They would remove all of the infected muscle as well as any infected tissue in the thigh, do extensive skin grafting and transfer him to St. Elizabeth's in Lincoln for recovery in the burn unit. (maybe an hour and a half)

3) They would open up his leg and discover the infection had done so much damage that the only option was to take the leg. (a couple hours at best)

They had already done a MRI looking for an abscess where they could drain the infection to help the antibiotic get through, but nothing showed up anywhere. Chris's foot and ankle, where it started, were swollen and beginning to turn black, but there hadn't been extensive change to make them believe there was anything happening other than the fact that his foot was "dying." All of the cultures they had done had plenty of time to "grow" something, but nothing was showing up. His blood tests were showing that his white blood cells were increasing...as was his fever. Because of all of this the doctors really were preparing Tami and Chris and the family for #3 above. They were truly expecting the worst when they opened up his leg.

So Thursday morning they prepped him for surgery and brought him in at 7:30 Central time. Tami waited with our Mom & Dad, Josh, Josiah, Beth & Jake, as well as Chris's brother and sister-in-law, Dan & Dusty, and I'm not sure who else was there....but they all waited.

An hour went by.

An hour and a half went by.

Tami left the room and when Dad went looking for her to see how she was doing he found her out in the hall crying softly by herself. When he walked up to her she turned and said, "Oh, Dad, it's been so long. They're taking his leg...I just know it. It's taking so long." Everyone was preparing for the worst.

Everyone, that is, except for the surgeon in the operating room with Chris! God had other plans for him....

An hour and 52 minutes after they rolled Chris into the operating room my sister left me a message saying he had just come out.

The surgeon explained that the infection was not in his thigh muscle as they had originally thought. Because of this they were able to get a good biopsy and a good look at the infection and stitch him back up. However, as the Dr. stood there looking at Chris's leg he said it just wasn't sitting well with him ~ he wanted to know where the source was. At this point they were concerned about the entire leg...and were really focusing on the upper leg. The foot was a concern, but it wasn't the main concern at this point so they weren't paying that much attention to it. But as the Dr. said...as he thought about the source he looked at Chris's foot and realized it was a lot worse than it was last night at 5:00. So he went to the foot and opened it up. He was surprised that the outer layer of skin was still pliable, but the interior layers were done...they were pretty much dead.

That wasn't the only surprise.

Inside his foot was a three inch abscess that wasn't there before. As he applied minimal pressure along the abscess he said the pus and infection simply poured out of his foot. Someone, I believe Mom & Dad, told me it was about a quart-sized fruit jar's worth that poured out of this abscess. (sorry, I know it's gross) They were then able to remove much of the infected tissue around his foot ~ and I believe (but don't quote me) they were able to leave all his muscle around the foot...if I'm remembering correctly my conversation with my sister she said they were able to leave all the meat.

Now, I don't know if that abscess was there and the MRI simply didn't pick it up, or it happened to grow overnight, but what I do know is that God heard and answered the prayers of all who are and have been praying for Chris. The God who sees all, knows all, hears all, and loves us like we've never been able to comprehend was directing the thoughts of that surgeon to look at something he wasn't there to deal with and see that it was worse than it had been 12 hours earlier. Most surgeons I know, although that's not many so this isn't that big of a "gotcha," don't go into surgery thinking, "well, if it's not there maybe we'll open up his liver and see if there's anything there. And if there's nothing there maybe we'll check this or that out too. Afterall, he's already under ~ why not do a little more checking under the hood while he's there?" This surgeon was preparing for a surgery on a thigh...or an amputation of the entire leg...not an abscess in a foot!

I could go on, but my husband just came out to the computer for the third time and gave me "that look" and said, "well, I guess I'll just say goodnight." So...I'll end this post with this...

Chris was up walking around for the first time in a week today! (He wasn't UP and walking around like he is fully recovered, but the Physical Therapists had him out of bed and moving ~ the beginning of recovery!) He's in good spirits and everyone is feeling good about the direction this is now taking.

Praise God for His mercies! They are new every morning...thought for the day....

Psalm 119: 105-112
"Your Word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path.
I have taken an oath and confirmed it, that I will follow Your righteous laws.
I have suffered much; preserve my life, O Lord, according to Your Word.
Accept, O Lord, the willing praise of my mouth, and teach me Your laws.
Though I constantly take my life in my hands, I will not forget Your law.
The wicked have set a snare for me, but I have not strayed from Your precepts.
Your statutes are my heritage forever; they are the joy of my heart.
My heart is set on keeping Your decrees to the very end."

Praise God from whom all blessings flow...
Praise Him all creatures here below.
Praise Him above ye heavenly hosts,
Praise Father, Son and Holy Ghost.....

...Amen.

My Brother - in - Law

My brother-in-law, Chris, has been a part of my family for about 3/4 of my entire life. I met him when I was 7. My sister was in 9th grade and she met Chris at Youth Camp in Weeping Water, NE. At the time I thought he was the cutest boy on earth. He was strong, muscular, had a great smile and looked at my sister as if she was the queen of the world. I remember when he came to take her to her Jr. Prom...he drove a Nova then, and it was jacked up in the back (because that was cool in the 70's!). He painted the axle black and in red paint he wrote "Chris loves Tami" in a big heart. I thought it was the most romantic thing ever ~ like proclaiming his love for my sister (who, being 7 years older than me, was worthy of it all in my book) wherever he went. He wanted the whole world to know how lucky he was to marry Tami.

The cool thing was, Tami felt the same way about Chris. When she'd talk about him she'd get this silly little grin on her face...and her eyes would twinkle. We used to tease her because it was all so sappy and wonderful. I remember sitting in our living room on New Year's morning watching the parade on TV surrounded by pink, blue, white and green petals and leaves that we were attaching to little buds to make the flowers for the bouquets that would be used in Tami & Chris's wedding just over a month away on February 21, 1981. At 11 years old I couldn't help but want what they had when I got married.

Flash forward 26 years ~ Tami & Chris are still very much in love. I am amazed when I'm around them with the love, the honest-to-goodness love, that shines in their eyes when they look at each other. They don't have the starry-eyed kind of look anymore. No, now they have the look that says "I fell in love with you for all the right reasons and they still stand today."

That's why it's so hard to be 1500 miles away from the hospital where my sister sits by Chris's bedside and prays for the infection that is in his leg to stop proceeding up to his bum and beyond. The doctors are confused. The infectious disease specialist is confused. The surgeons are confused. They are all concerned and preparing for the worst. Nothing is touching the infection ~ they have no idea what started it, they have no idea what the strain is, they have no idea about anything at all except that the red streaks that are going up his leg are obviously putting him in more and more danger everyday. And Tami stands there, sits there, reclines there in the almost-an-open-taco chair they've brought in for her to rest in and she prays and she cries and she prays some more.

The picture above is from last summer when we were in South Dakota. That is their family except for Joshua, their oldest son, and his wife Andrea with their son, Isaiah. (Andrea is pregnant and due in May sometime) Chris is an outdoors-kinda guy. He loves to bow-hunt, ride his motocross bikes with his sons, and has a career in construction. He's active, strong and muscular. Losing his leg is not something he ever thought would happen. None of us ever do.

I would appreciate your prayers for Chris & Tami. We all know our hope isn't in a healthy leg, although we're praying for it, but our hope is in the God who made the leg in the first place. our faith isn't in a "favorable outcome" according to what we would want, but our faith is in the Lord who has given us the ultimate in favorable outcomes through His Son's death & resurrection. We are safe and secure in the arms of God ~ and our hope remains in Him. With that said, our prayers are that He, being the Great Physician, would heal Chris from this weird infection that no one but He knows the details of.

Chris really is more like a brother to me than a brother-in-law. It is he to whom I owe the greatest amount of gratitude for helping me through the dark parts of my pregnancy with Sophie. It was Chris who introduced me to a singer by the name of Steven Curtis Chapman and told me to listen to "The Treasure of You" over and over again until it sunk in. It was from Chris I received the inspiration to play that CD in my CD player with the headphones on my belly so Sophie would know she is precious, loved, wanted and beautiful despite the circumstances of her birth. (and I can say with confidence that was the case for both of her biological parents...we just all handle life differently when we're young and stupid.)

Treasure Of You by Steven Curtis Chapman
(warning, this will take you away from this page ~ I suggest right clicking and then clicking "open in new window" to listen to this song...)

I can thank Chris for that, too...the grace to forgive the pain of being abandoned. It was his perspective of a father, and the desire for her biological father to experience the joy that comes from freedom in Christ, that encouraged forgiveness in my own heart. Yes, Chris really is more of a brother to me than a guy who's married to my sister.

My heart is weary knowing all they've gone through in the past 12 months. This infection is not the first "issue" that has tested their faith. Not even close. And, to be honest, if only the other issues could simply be opened up, removed and patched back up.....they'd be a whole lot easier to handle. Thank God we don't have to carry them!

I'm rambling because my heart is so weary ~ I desperately want to be flying to Nebraska right now and not sitting in my loft in Vancouver writing about the people I long to be putting my arms around. Thank you for praying for all of us ~ and thank you for praying for God's healing power in Chris's leg, but mostly in their family.

with a great big sigh and prayer of surrender,
Trayc

here's a picture of my grand-nephew, Chris & Tami's first grandchild, Isaiah Tate. He's Josh & Andrea's son, and about to become a big brother!



Here's a picture of my second nephew, Josiah, and his (then) girlfriend, Emily from last summer...



And here's Bethany, my neice, who is now a Freshman at University of Nebraska, Lincoln ~ yup! She's a Husker!!!



And finally, here's Jacob, the baby of the family. He's a High School student anxiously awaiting his 16th birthday on June 19th. The boys loved hanging out with him a couple of years ago....

Borrow Mine

Borrow Mine by Bebo Norman
(warning...clicking the above link will take you away from this page...I suggest "right clicking" and then clicking "open in new window". ENJOY!)

Okay, so I've discovered an "old" song that I need to share. It's an incredible song of servitude. It's a song that epitomizes what it is to truly walk beside someone when their faith is shaky. So many times I have experienced a couple of steps with someone who thought a quick-fix would turn everything around only to be hurt even more deeply, and have my faith even shakier, when they quit walking and instead went where maybe it was "easier." I've even had incredible, Godly women basically tell me I just needed to suck it up when I asked how they made it through the early baby years. I've learned so much from these very women ~ I've had the emotional response to be able to create postcards and cards and poetry saying what I longed for someone else to say to me when I was surrounded by gray and darkness. But I never could write a song....probably because I have no song-writing ability...but maybe it's because Bebo Norman wrote exactly what I would have written.

I found a webpage that quoted an interview with Bebo about this song. Here is what he said: “A young woman that I love dearly was recently in a very difficult hopeless place in her life. A close friend asked her if she had faith that God would bring her through her pain. Her answer was very honest, ‘No. I wish that I did, but I don’t seem to have the faith to believe that right now.’ Our friend replied to her, ‘Borrow mine. Borrow my faith, because I am sharing your pain with you, and I am certain that our God is in this and will grow you through this.’ She found so much strength and courage in that response. What a beautiful real life picture of the body of Christ and our command from God to ‘carry each other’s burdens and in this way fulfill the law of Christ.’ (Galatians 6:2)

Here are the lyrics ~ read them and pray that God would bring to mind someone who needs to borrow yours for a while...even if that means a few miles instead of steps.

Take my hand
And walk with me awhile
Because it seems your smile
Has left you

And don't give in
When you fall apart
And your broken heart
Has failed you

I'll set a light up
On a hilltop
To show you my love
For this world to see

You can borrow mine
When your hope is gone
You can borrow mine
When you can't go on
Cause the world will not defeat you
When we're side by side
When your faith is hard to find
You can borrow mine
You can borrow mine

And take my love
When all that you can see
Is the raging sea
All around us

And don't give up
Cause I'm not letting go
And the God we know
Will not fail us

We'll lay it all down
As we call out
Sweet Savior
Help our unbelief

You can borrow mine
When your hope is gone
Borrow mine
When you can't go on
Cause the world will not defeat you
When we're side by side
When your faith is hard to find
You can borrow mine

When you are weak
Unable to speak
You are not alone
God of us, save us
And never forsake us
He's coming to take us
Take us to our home

You can borrow mine
When your hope is gone
Borrow mine
When you can't go on
Cause the world will not defeat you
When we're side by side
When your faith is hard to find
When your faith is hard to find
You can borrow mine
You can borrow mine

Take my hand
Take my love
Don't give in, no
And don't give up

*******

Before I go, I want to thank those people in my life who have let me "borrow theirs" when I wondered where God was...Tami ~ my incredible sister; Mom ~ a woman I am proud to rise and call blessed; Donna ~ a friend beyond words; Tara ~ my "tell-it-like-it-is-and-take-no-crap" blessing from God; Molly, Trisha, Sheila, Angie,and all my MOMS Leadership Bible Study brave women ~ I love your Mary Spirits!; Tammy; David & Dawn; Uncle Jim & Aunt Dee; Dad ~ in your own special way you reminded me of the beauty of Christ that surrounds me everyday...sometimes in the strangest of places; Pastor Bill ~ for the best words ever written in a birthday card you win the prize! 30 was so much easier because of you; ...there are so many more...I know I can't name all of you, but you know who you are. I thank you and pray that you will receive back what you've given tenfold. God bless you all!

(whew! I feel like I've just won an award..."I'd like to thank the Academy..." HAHA!)