So what are your New Year's Resolutions?
We have some interesting ones in our home ~ from "becoming a better artist" to "eating less and losing a little bit of weight" (not who you think it is!). I've already seen them lain aside, though, for the empty art of TV or iPod games and the temptation of fresh baked cookies. Funny how quickly resolutions becomes passing thoughts...dreams...hopes unfulfilled.
I myself have lived through 43 New Year celebrations now, and in the amount of time in which I knew how to make a resolution I can honestly say I've made and left at least 43. Yes, I realize I could not possibly have made a resolution each year of my life, but 43 is probably a low number of resolutions made and broken in my lifetime. It is the making and discarding I am getting at.
Let me give an example...
It's morning and the kids have gone to school. The Hubster is upstairs in his office working away and I'm having some problems getting motivated to do anything other than bits and tibbles of work here and there. Although I'm not tackling big projects I am certainly getting our house in order and doing those tasks that need to be done. Maybe not very quickly, but hey, they're getting done, right? Then I start to feel hungry and realize it's after noon. I make a somewhat healthier lunch than I would have prior to the New Year and sit down at my computer to eat and "take a quick break."
I finish the sandwich. I finish my water. I have not, however, finished surfing all these great blogs about what to make for dinner. Oh! I wanted to check on another recipe a friend was telling me about...and someone else mentioned on Facebook (it's still open in a tab ready to be checked at any given second or while I'm waiting that 2 seconds for a new blog to load) a pin they saw on Pinterest for something or other to do with the boys...and all of the sudden my oldest son is walking in the door saying, "Hi, Mom!"
Wait. WHA??????
I sat down at 1:00...I was just going to eat and check on a recipe or two and now it's 3:00??? How. Did. That. Happen???
Yes, you're correct...lack of self control.
Here's another one. It's one that I heard about from a friend and would NEVER have a problem with! (okay, so I was pretending to write a blog about it one day while getting ready in the morning....it was still a friend who told me about it. :) )
Son #1: 'Night Mom, will you pray with me?
Me: Sure ~ (prayer)
Son #2: 'Night Mom, will you pray with me?
Me: Sure ~ (prayer); 'Night boys. I love you! Sweet dreams!
Both boys: Love you, too, goodnight!
Hubster: wanna watch an episode of Hawaii Five-O we have on DVR?
Me: sure!
(watch one episode and hubster gets up, throws me the remote and heads to bed saying, "here ya go, night owl...see you tomorrow.")
I press the DVR button and up pops a Chick Flick I'd taped from the Hallmark channel a while ago and hadn't watched yet. Settle in with a cuppa and enjoy the quiet solitude of my house while checking Facebook, Pinterest and assorted emails, etc, all the while following the story onscreen.
Movie ends.
I'm in the middle of a game of Nerts on my iPod...must finish...start another episode of something taped.
Ugh. It's 12:30 am! ...should go to bed. But this is a good part! Just finish this and then head to bed.
1:30 am ~ I. Must. Go. To. Bed!
2:00 am ~ great! I'm in bed, why can't I fall asleep?? Oh...maybe I should put the iPod down.
7:15 am ~ alarm goes off...SNOOZE!
7:24 am ~ alarm goes off...SNOOOZE....somewhat groggy brain kicks in to the fact that I don't hear the regular noise of a child getting ready for school downstairs. I pull myself out of bed to wander down the hall to wake up said child and let him know he now has 15 minutes to get ready and out to the bus.
7:27 am ~ Coffee. COOOOOOFFFFFEEEEE. Why am I so tired this morning? Oh, yeah.....
Why? Because I lack self-control!
I am a Spirit led woman. I love the Lord with all my heart, mind, soul and strength, and try to love my neighbor as myself....but where on earth did my self-control go???
No, I didn't leave it in High School when someone else was in charge of my schedule.
No, I didn't leave it in College when a professor's attendance chart determined my success.
No, I didn't leave it in Hawaii when the Hubster and I returned from our honeymoon.
I have never had it.
I will rise to the occasion and learn the arias, songs and various pieces necessary to perform. I will clean the house in a day if company is coming (don't go to my room, please). I will plan, instigate and complete a $12,000.00 Book Fair in two weeks simply because I have to.
I will not, however, wake up each morning and know what tasks need to be completed today to insure that tomorrow's dinner will be ready on time. I will not start a paper due three months from now with an outline and a rough draft that will be re-written a number of times in order for the paper to be handed in on time with no mistakes (I will, however, do research here and there and write the paper the day or two before...hand it in and get an "A").
Some call it procrastination. Some call it laziness. Some call it unmotivated.
God calls it lack of Self Control.
He also says it's a fruit of the Spirit. Which means that He is willing to help us with it. Which means HE has the ability to instill it in is, grow it in us, and help us to live up to the potential He has placed in us.
WHEW!
Want to know what one of my resolutions this year is? To write more.
Want to know why I sat down at the computer today? To look for something to make for dinner tonight.
Want to know what I've done instead? Written an entry on my "Apples of Gold" blog and written a post here. (Of which I had no idea what to write about when I sat down.)
Maybe there is a breath of self-control in me after all.
NAH. That's all God! Thank you, Lord!
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