MOBster

Yes, I've decided it's time I joined the MOB. Not just any MOB. Nope, the REAL MOB is the only MOB to belong to! And only certain people are allowed in. You cannot be male, but you must have intimate relationships with males in your life. The intimate relationships you have with the males in your life must not be with your husband because he is not able to be in this MOB. Nope. You've gotta have intimate relationships with males who are younger than you and look up to you for guidance, instruction and affection. To be a member of the REAL MOB you must be the Mother Of Boys.

That's right - I'm the Grandmother MOBster. I've formed a new club for all my friends who have way too many gray hairs way too early in their lives and constantly look like they just stepped off a roller-coaster experience went bad. (in some cases, VERY bad!) MOGs are not allowed as they just don't get it and the purpose of the group is to get away from their looks of "can't you control your child?!"

MOBsters is a support group for women who understand that, "no, we have tried, but we really do not get that testosterone thing and have since accepted that 'the need for speed' is truly ingrained since birth."

If you are a MOBster and would like to have a place where you can go to discuss, vent, laugh, cry and scream about what being in the MOB has done to you please let me know and I will send you an official, bullet-holed, secretive and highly confidential invitation. But, when you get it, remember....MUMS the word!

Now, for those of you who are not MOBsters...read the following and enjoy a sneak peak inside the life of a Mother Of Boys.........

The following came from an anonymous Mother in Austin, Texas... Things I've learned from my Boys (honest and not kidding):
1.) A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. ft. house 4 inches deep.
2.) If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.
3.) A 3-year old Boy's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.
4.) If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42 pound Boy wearing Batman underwear and a Superman cape. It is strong enough, however, if tied to a paint can, to spread paint on all four walls of a 20x20 ft. room.
5.) You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on. When using a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way
6.) The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.
7.) When you hear the toilet flush and the words "uh oh", it's already too late.
8.) Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.
9.) A six-year old Boy can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36-year old Man says they can only do it in the movies.
10.) Certain Lego's will pass through the digestive tract of a 4-year old boy.
11.) Play dough and microwave should not be used in the same sentence.
12.) Super glue is forever.
13.) No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still can't walk on water.
14.) Pool filters do not like Jell-O.
15.) VCR's do not eject "PB & J" sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do.
16.) Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.
17.) Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.
18.) You probably DO NOT want to know what that odor is.
19.) Always look in the oven before you turn it on; plastic toys do not like ovens.
20.) The fire department in Austin, TX has a 5-minute response time.
21.) The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy.
22.) It will, however, make cats dizzy.
23.) Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.
24.) 80% of Men who read this will try mixing the Clorox and brake fluid.
25.) Women will pass this on to almost all of their friends, with or without kids.